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Let’s Celebrate

December 6, 2012
Jane Whitmore , Emmetsburg News

The weekend was bustling with holiday events

The lighted Christmas Parade was a big hit. It almost looked like St. Pat's weekend with all the people downtown. The weather was mild and that helped a lot.

The quality of the floats was fantastic! For the first year, the parade was first rate. They really lighted up the street and put everyone in a holiday mood.

There were so many people at the parade that wanted to see Santa and Mrs. Claus and hear Biblical Brass &?Beyond at the Chamber, it was almost overwhelming. The wagon pulled by Holly and Hoss was filled to capacity each time they made the trip around Courthouse Square.

Chamber Director Deb Hite e-mailed a Thank You that designated people who helped make the night a success: Emmetsburg Care Center, the Knights of Columbus, Ardelle Connor and Dewey Blatchford, Pony Express and Iowa Trust & Savings Bank who sponsored the Pony Express, The Reporter & The Democrat, Pizza Ranch, Mainstreet Memories Mall and Chamber Media -- and a special thanks to the Emmetsburg Retail Association.

We can't wait to see next year's parade.

Saturday morning, all the little shoppers went to Santa's Secret Shop. Hosted by Progress Club, the young ones got to pick out gifts for family and friends all by themselves. They felt -- and looked -- so grown up.

Later that morning was the Red Hat Christmas Brunch. Over 80 Red Hat ladies gathered for the event, hosted this year by the Sassy Lassies. (See photos on page 5.)

The guest speaker started her talk with: "If anything I say offends you...get over it!" That got our attention! Her name is Marilyn Patterson, "The Toilet Paper Lady."

"I've had a long term, intimate relationship with toilet paper," she told us.

Marilyn shared her collection of toilet paper, with rolls from the Ukraine, Norway, China, Panama, Spain and France. She has embroidered toilet paper and other rolls with snowmen, happy birthday, bride and groom, and jokes printed on the squares.

When it comes to toilet paper users, Marilyn says there are folders, wadders and wrappers, and the reach arounder and the reach througher. She gave us a brief history of toilet paper, from the 14th Century to Mr. Whipple. In today's market, United States consumers spend $6 billion a year for toilet paper. Here's a little known fact: the Pentagon uses 666 rolls of toilet paper every day.

Other products used in place of toilet paper include: leaves, corn husks, grass, corn cobs, catalogs, newspapers and discarded wool. In other areas of the world, people might use sponges, or snow with tundra moss...even sand!

If you were stranded on a desert island and could take one thing, what would it be? 49-percent of those responding said they would take toilet paper.

Marilyn's parting words:?May your life by like a roll of toilet paper - long and useful.

If you don't like that advise -- get over it!



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